Who Goes First In Wedding Vows? Bride Or Groom?

If you’re curious about who goes first in wedding vows, the groom will go before the bride. But before you go on with this order for the marriage vows, it would help you give this guide a quick read to know the expectations regarding the vows so that you can plan with your partner much better. 

We will also share some wedding vow examples to guide you further. Then, feel free to browse our blog to know how long should wedding vows be and other expectations regarding the different parts of the wedding ceremony.

who goes first in wedding vows


Who Traditionally Goes First In Wedding Vows?

The groom traditionally goes first in the wedding vows, and he’ll precede the bride in saying, “I do.” However, note that most weddings nowadays have their own versions of the ceremony order.

There are no rules that require the bride and groom to follow the traditional order of reading the wedding vows. So if the bride wants to read her vows before the groom, it’s also acceptable. 


What is the format for wedding vows?

There is no standard format for writing and saying your wedding vows to each other. However, you can consider this template as a guide to get you started:

  1. Talk about the things you love about your partner and how they’ve improved your life
  2. You can also talk about the moment you first met or that instance that made you realize they’re the one
  3. Include personal stories and moments that solidify your love for each other, but make sure that they’re still appropriate for all the guests
  4. Mention your promises to your partners such as being with them through the hardships and best moments of their life
  5. Don’t forget to mention that you love your partner
  6. Finish the vows with how you’re looking forward to your marriage and the goals you want to embody as a married couple


Modern wedding vow examples

  • [Partner’s name or nickname], from the moment we first met on [reminsice about the time or place you’ve first met them], I knew that you were going to be a significant part of your life. [Mention your favorite aspects and traits about your partner and how they contributed to you as a person]. I promise to love you and [promises about your loyalty and consistency]. I look forward to [imagine your ideal married life]. This is my solemn vow.
  • I choose you to be my husband/wife, and I promise to love and cherish you through thick and thin. I promise to [insert your own quirk or a relatable inside joke] I will always comfort you even if [mention your partner’s funny trait]. I love you, and I’ll always do. 


Does The Man Or Woman Say Vows First?

 The groom usually goes first with the wedding vows, but you and your partner can decide the order of the vow exchange. There are no rules stating that the man should read his vows first.

Another instance where you can modify the traditional order of the vow exchange is on LGBTQIA+ and nondenominational weddings, so please feel free to do what you deem is appropriate. The essence of the vows is to proclaim and promise your love for each other, regardless of the order of who goes first. 


What are wedding vows supposed to say?

  • Description and why you love your partner
  • A brief love story and best moments in your relationship
  • Promises for the future and how you’ll strive to be the best husband/wife to your spouse
  • Reassurance that you’ll always be there for your partner, both in the good and bad times of life
  • Things you’re looking forward to in your married life
  • Things you’ll strive to be as a married couple
  • Mention how much you love them and don’t forget to add humor and personality, so the vows don’t translate too emotionless


Do You Exchange Rings Before Or After The Vows?

Traditionally, you’ll exchange wedding rings after the wedding vows. After all, the rings are the wedding symbols of loyalty to your partner, so it’s only fitting to give them to each other after mentioning your promises for the marriage. 

It’s also possible to say the vows as you exchange rings in the ceremony. The ring exchange doesn’t always have to be the “seal” of the vows. 


What Happens During The Exchange Of Vows?

The exchange of vows is the part of the wedding ceremony where the couple will talk about their promises and love for each other. There are also ceremonies where the couple will only repeat the vows mentioned by the wedding officiant. 

Do you want a more personal ceremony? Why not ask a friend to officiate your wedding?


Do You Have To Exchange Vows?

It’s not required to exchange vows in the wedding ceremony, especially if you want a short and quick wedding. However, your partner and the guests will surely appreciate hearing your affirmations and love for each other. 

Nonetheless, you can choose to omit the vow exchange and go straight to the ring exchange. Some couples also opt to express their vows by dancing at the reception. 



And that’s it! To recap who goes first in wedding vows, it is the groom.

However, it wouldn’t be wrong for the bride to go first as well. In same-sex weddings, the couple can freely decide the order of their vow exchange. 

We hope this was helpful; leave us a question if you have any. 

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