How To Have A Small Wedding With A Big Family

If you want to know how to have a small wedding with a big family, try two things to avoid offending anyone. Nowadays, it’s okay to prioritize practicality with the wedding, especially when you have to stick to a specific budget. 

We hope this guide will help you get the best wedding, but we also recommend that you read tips on how to ask someone to be at your wedding. This way, you can communicate your expectations about their presence.  

how to have a small wedding with a big family


How To Throw A Small Wedding With A Big Family


Communicate well 

Start with ensuring that you have communicated all the expectations you want for the wedding. This means spreading the word about your desire for an intimate wedding as early as the engagement party. 

You can also ask your family members to mention that you decided to have a small wedding, so no one will assume they might be invited immediately. You must start creating and finalizing a guest list of the people you want to be at your wedding, so you will be consistent when asked who is invited. 

By communicating your preference of having a small wedding early on, you can avoid miscommunications or have some people take it personally when they find out they aren’t invited. You are also setting the expectations early on to count on close family members to spread the word. 


Set boundaries

The second tip to having a small wedding despite having a big family is ensuring that you hold onto your boundaries. Do not give in to the pressure of family members to have a big wedding, especially when you can’t or don’t want to. 

Some couples might also prefer to have an intimate ceremony with only the most important people. Just make sure that you are calm but assertive each time someone presents the idea of holding a bigger wedding. 

You don’t want to sound aggressive as this may provoke arguments and the potential to hurt other people’s feelings. Remember that some people won’t get it, but that’s okay because the wedding is about you and your significant other and you can always celebrate with other family members at another time. 


How Do You Tell An Extended Family If You Have A Small Wedding?


Assign people to spread the word

The best way to tell the extended family about your plan of having a small wedding is to tell your closest family members to spread the word. You can even consider assigning your parents or siblings to be the ones explaining to distant relatives and non-immediate family members why you won’t have a big wedding. 

They likely know these family members better and approach them much more effectively. Make sure that you mention the reasons such as budget or personal preference to make it more understandable for the uninvited. 


Mention it on social media

Nowadays, there’s no doubt that social media is the best way to reach more people about your intentions. For example, you can casually but firmly mention that you’re keeping your wedding small and further clarify that it’s meant to be attended by only the immediate family and closest friends. 

Furthermore, this presents an opportunity for you to be contacted by extended and distant family members. You can clarify your desire to do an intimate wedding once they approach you, assuming they can come. 


How Do You Do A Simple Wedding With A Big Family?


Limit guests

After ensuring that you have your intent mentioned to the guests and you’ve set boundaries with non-immediate family members, it would be best to clarify it more in the wedding invitation. 

Limit plus-ones or consider having a no-kid policy to ensure that the wedding will be small. By limiting the plus-one, you can stay within your guest list, and having no kids mean there’s no need for extra babysitters. 


Find an alternative to celebrate with the uninvited

Nobody wants to be on bad terms with any family member. Therefore, you can still celebrate with the uninvited another way to make them feel included with the new chapter of your life. 

For example, you can throw a party where extended family members, distant family, and acquaintances can attend. You can also have a larger reception, even with an intimate wedding ceremony, so that the entire family can celebrate together. 


Is Having A Small Wedding Rude?

Having a small wedding is not rude because it is ultimately for the bride and groom and the people they want to see in the ceremony. Furthermore, throwing a big wedding can be impractical, especially with a limited budget. 

For example, you might be on the fence about who pays for a destination wedding, especially when the guest list is long. It wouldn’t be fair that you won’t get your dream wedding and settle for something you don’t like only to accommodate people who aren’t even close to you. 

Some couples also prefer an intimate celebration to make the ceremony deeper and more personal. Therefore, choosing a small wedding is not wrong as long as you communicate it gently but firmly with your family and friends.  



And that’s it! We learned how to have a small wedding with a big family by communicating well and setting boundaries.

These two tips will help you stick to your desire without offending other people. We hope this helps; leave us a question if you have any. 

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